Morale Counselling

Posted on Tue Aug 29, 2017 @ 7:10pm by Ensign Terry Walsh & Lieutenant JG Jacob Hartley

Mission: Strange Matter
Location: Morale Officer's Office

Jacob stood, looking out of the windows of the office he was standing in, trying to decide where to begin what he had to say. "Don't get me wrong, it's nothing against you, but I just...I never had counselling with a Morale Officer before. I suppose in a way it's good, because it's a little less...formal. But how do I start with any of this? I mean, let's face it, in my line of work, keeping my own counsel usually is a boon. Now, having to share...well, personal issues, it's a little daunting, wouldn't you agree?" Jacob asked.

"Sharing personal issues can be daunting," said Terry. "Even more so I'd imagine for an Intelligence officer. But I'm sure you've had other daunting things in your life. Correct?" Terry leaned back in his chair and relaxed.

"Kind of comes with the job, to be fair." Jacob agreed, as he turned and faced Walsh. "Undercover Ops, dealing with classified data...hell, even basic training can be daunting, if you're not prepared. And sharing personal information...well, it's not easy." He said. "I mean, you know why I was ordered here. I will admit, I don't understand why, but then, I'm not in Command. And this is the first time I've been told to handle these kind of issues. It's not like I even wanted the company to begin with, yet here I am. But am I stuck with it, or is that an excuse?" Jacob asked.

He sighed. "It's just so...complicated."

"Many times, we're the ones that make them complicated," said Terry. "We can see the simplicity. Or we refuse to because it means we'd have to admit to something or be held accountable. But since this is the first time you've been told to handle these kinds of issues, why don't start by looking at the ones that you haven't dealt with. Then maybe we'll find out how to handle these newer ones. So tell me, what is one of those past issues?"

"Mostly to do with the past. I inherited my family company, with the proviso that it stay in the family. Someone managed it for years, and when I was old enough I told them to keep managing it because I didn't want to. But legally, it's my company. I get an income which has built up over years in a bank account, but I don't touch it because I don't want it. Why would I? It never belonged to me, but to my parents, if you can call them that." Jacob said.

Ahh, parents, if you can call them that, thought Terry. "Sounds like you and your parents don't get along. Did they spend a lot time building the business?"

"When they were alive, yeah. Put profit above everything, including not 'wasting' money on new parts if they could get by. They chose to use a second hand part when doing repairs, which led to them being killed when I was a week old. Not exactly parent material, wouldn't you agree?" Jacob asked.

"Whether I agree or not doesn't have much of a bearing on your childhood," said Terry. "But I'm sorry to hear that you grew up not knowing them. Many parents wish to provide the best for their children. Some even go the point that they want to give them everything they never had. It sounds like your parents were trying to make a good life for you so you would have nothing to worry about. So who raised you after they passed?"

"If they were trying to make a good life for me, they'd have upgraded the ship we were on. I was fostered as a kid, plenty of people willing to adopt a one week old baby." Jacob said. "Foster home wasn't bad, except when I found out what being fostered meant. The family had kept my last name, but when I was six I found out why my last name was different to my adoptive parents."

"How old were you when you starting trying to find out who your real parents were?" asked Terry.

"Sixteen, and only because I was told I was the owner of a shipping company, with a large bank balance." Jacob replied. "Didn't care much before that, still not overly worried now."

"And why is that?" asked Terry.

"Like I said, they were the ones who didn't care enough to make the proper repairs. It's their company, I'm just a name on a book. They built the company, I've never had anything to do with it." Jacob explained. "Hell, I wouldn't have known about the attack on a ship if they hadn't contacted the Commander. I just...parents are meant to be there to guide you. Mine never were. If they hadn't been so obsessed with profit, like a damned Ferengi, they might not have died."

"I believe you miss your parents to a degree. They weren't there to guide and instruct you as you grew. You say they were obsessed with getting more profit and as a result, they died," said Terry. "Have you considered that you have a ship full of people that can guide you? People that aren't obsessed with more profit and who won't leave you."

"That's why I joined Starfleet, and ignored the company. I found a report of the accident, which is why I know of what happened. It was in my first year that I was recruited into Intelligence. It was a long road, but it was a path that had nothing to do with profit, or trading or anything like what my parents had done. Do I miss them? I guess I miss who I wanted them to be when I was a child. And I'm alone in some sense of the word. Yes, I'm on a ship of people who can guide me, and I work with them, but I've always said I need to find a path of my choice and work." Jacob explained.

"Finding our own path can be a lonesome journey without a guide to help," said Terry. "How would you feel if you had someone to help guide you now? I realize it's way too late in regards to your formative years, but having someone to call a friend, buddy, or parent figure to help when you need it could relieve some of this stress."

"Not entirely sure what a parent figure could do at this point. My adoptive parents died shortly before I graduated. Friends...in my line of work, they tend to be few and far between, mostly because I don't often get time or the luxury of friends." Jacob replied.

"That's part of the difficulty working in Starfleet, and with Intelligence in particular, having friends," said Terry. "But I recommend you start making the time for finding some. There are plenty of places around here to go after work."

"That's assuming I have time after work." Jacob replied, with a sigh. "How would anyone even start making friends?"

Terry eyed the man for a moment, wondering if he'd ever been the first one initiate a friendship in his life. "The first thing I would say is that if you know who you're looking for, it becomes easier to find them. Start with these questions. What kind of person do you love hanging out with? What made a childhood friendship so special? What kind of person fits well with your personality? What activities would you love to have a partner for? Then you look at the list above and see if anyone you already know pops into your head. If no one does, that’s ok, you're starting from scratch. Make a list of places on the ship, groups, clubs, and classes where you might meet the kind of person above. That, I would say, would be step one."

"You make it sound so easy. For me, I've always lived by a code. Precision, swapping out the people and parts that don't work until you find a combination that do." Jacob said. "The main thing I'm good at is Parkour. It's both relaxing and invigorating at the same time. I don't know if there's anyone here who knows of it."

"Have you been asking around?" Terry asked simply.

"Asked a few people, been on the holodeck with a couple of people. Not found anyone yet." Jacob replied.

"Okay. Then maybe it's time to expand your horizons," said Terry. "Try something new. Something other than parkour. Get someone to teach you something new. And keeping in mind the questions I just asked, remember some of the most important things in making new friends as an adult are these. Friends are for fun, for play, and for relaxation. But also, the best of friends are there for you when you need them. As you are interacting with a potential friend, tap into how they make you feel. Do you laugh with them? Do they make you feel excited? You want people who make you feel good."

"I stopped feeling good a long time ago. My life never really allowed for many friends. How do I go and start making a new friend? Hi, wanna be friends? I know I'm not the best of officers, and not the friendliest person, but I've always felt that this way, I don't disappoint people if I screw up. Makes things easier." Jacob replied.

"Jacob," said Terry, "we're going to disappoint people whether we have friends or not. But like I said, find someone that's the kind of person you like hanging out with. How do you do that? Go to the lounge after duty or the mess hall during lunch. You see a group of people sitting at a table and simply walk up. Introduce yourself with no rank, they can see that, and ask if you can join them."

"Easier said than done." Jacob replied, with a sigh. "I can only try, but I'm not expecting anything."

"Trying is all I ask," said Terry. He leaned back in his chair. "Tell you what, you try, see how it goes, and I'll be looking forward to hearing all about it next time. Because I will follow-up with you."

Jacob nodded. "Fair enough. I'll see you next time then." Jacob said, as he headed for the door. He hadn't ever been a fan of counselling, but it did give him something to think about; no, it gave him a lot to think about.